Meditation. Anti-Meditation.

May 6th, 2017

Well, seems life decided that my idea of “My Path” needed yet another sharp curve.

I will be moving. I hate moving. If feels like I was just getting settled! Okay, I can handle this. It wasn’t quite what I envisioned as part of all the changes I would be experiencing as part of this grand decision to change my life; not anytime soon, anyway.  But, I wanted (needed) change and, Boy, am I getting it!

Deep breath. I am simply going to embrace the ideal that things happen for a reason. Tomorrow. Tomorrow, I will embrace that ideal.

Today, I am going to procrastinate and use this time to settle myself, my thoughts, and emotions. Today, I decided to focus on a project…or a few projects.

So, this is one of the little things I threw myself into, today.

IMG_20170506_123512 Pen & colored pencils

There are a lot of extremely talented artists, out there. I am not one of them 🙂

But, that is okay. Because I didn’t do it for any other reason than to focus my mind. Or, maybe better stated: to “un-focus” my mind.

I use meditation to practice learning how to control the focus of my mind and its thoughts which, in turn, will give me better control of my emotions and how I react to them. However, I use art, crafts, music (and, I admit it: CSI and Criminal Minds) as  distractions when my mind will not leave something alone that I do not want or am not ready to think or worry about, at that time. It may seem funny, but I don’t look at it as simply choosing to focus on other things. I look at it as not focusing on certain things. I believe, for me, that is more pointed and a goal that is easier to zero in on. So, if I use meditation to focus, this could be looked at as “anti-meditation” to un-focus?

As for moving: it is a good thing and for a good reason. So, I am grateful that I am not having to move due to an illness of myself or a loved one or due to a loss of one sort or another.

I am grateful. I just wasn’t expecting this and can have no real idea of how this may influence all my grand plans; over which we all know I have complete control, right? Yeah, right!

It really didn’t ever cross my mind that I knew how everything would pay out or that I had complete control. I just didn’t realize how much not-in-control I was or how true it is that we can never really be prepared for everything.

I will get boxes and begin to tackle the chore of re-locating, tomorrow. Tomorrow; I know that I won’t actually have anymore control, tomorrow. But, maybe, hopefully, I won’t I feel not quite so not-in-control.

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